I've spent £80,000 to look like this at 67 and have had everything from a breast reduction to Turkey teeth, lip filler and an eyebrow transplant. Now LIZ JONES reveals what was worth it - and what to skip ⊖

What prompted a lifetime in stitches? Not the humorous kind - the painful sort. Was it worth it or, as that unsisterly commentator proclaimed, am I indeed awful, a laughing stock?